IF YOU HELP PEOPLE, YOU WILL START TO LIKE THEM.
So in regard to the idea of conversation, According to scientific studies, this is actually true! How about that?? I think that it does help to explain why some people don’t like others much, and don’t bother to talk to them and are therefore what I would refer to as “Non People”. So it becomes a vicious cycle.. As they become increasingly disconnected due to their dislike of most people caused by a refusal to put themselves out, they speak in more and more one syllable responses, or else just stare into space in your company:)
Here is an excerpt from the article. The full article is taken from here: A great blog by the way. http://youarenotsosmart.com/2011/10/05/the-benjamin-franklin-effect/
It is called the Benjamin Franklin Effect
“Benjamin Franklin’s hater came to like Franklin after doing him a favor, but what if he had done him harm instead? In 1971, at the University of North Carolina, psychologists John Schopler and John Compere asked students to help with an experiment. They had their subjects administer learning tests to accomplices pretending to be other students. The subjects were told the learners would watch as the teachers used sticks to tap out long patters on a series of wooden cubes. The learners would then be asked to repeat the patterns. Each teacher was to try out two different methods on two different people, one at a time. In one run, the teachers would offer encouragement when the learner got the patterns correct. In the other run of the experiment, the teacher would insult and criticize the learner when they messed up. Afterward, the teachers filled out a debriefing questionnaire which included questions about how attractive (as a human being, not romantically) and likable the learners were. Across the board, the subjects who received the insults were rated as less attractive than the ones who got encouragement. The teachers’ behavior created their perception. You tend to like the people to whom you are kind and dislike the people to whom you are rude. From the Stanford Prison Experiment to Abu Ghraib, to concentration camps and the attitudes of soldiers spilling blood, mountains of evidence suggest behaviors create attitudes when harming just as they do when helping. Jailers come to look down on inmates; camp guards come to dehumanize their captives; soldiers create derogatory terms for their enemies. It’s difficult to hurt someone you admire. It’s even more difficult to kill a fellow human being. Seeing the casualties you create as something less than you, something deserving of damage, makes it possible to continue seeing yourself as a good and honest person, to continue being sane.”
This post relates to Object number 2. The Strand of Conversation in the What the Hell is Your Problem Kit. A Kit for Uptight White People.
